Tuesday, October 13, 2009

tidings of imminent yore

INTERN has eaten her Goodbye Lunch of curry and various triangular fried things.
INTERN has opened her Goodbye Card and delighted that 9 out of 12 signees spelled her name right.
INTERN has taken one last wander through the book shelves and filled her backpack to capacity with irresistible Goodbye Books.
INTERN has made one last round of jovial conversation with the Head and Assistant Eds, the Editorial Assistant, and various and sundry other friendly publishing folk.
INTERN has cast last, loving gazes at the mail machine, the rare orchids in their pots, the coffee machine, and the red leather couch where she spent so many days reading queries and tinkering with stuff.
INTERN has taken the stairs down, carrying her bike on her shoulder, and said goodbye to the cheerful doorman.
INTERN is not even writing this from Big Fancy Publishing Office, but from a coffee shop a few blocks down.

INTERN is officially not an intern anymore, though she remains so in spirit.

"What now?" wonders INTERN, taking a bite of an oversized Oatmeal Cookie.

Shall she run away to sea, become a vacuum cleaner saleswoman, or busk for spare change with her doleful melodica? And what of this blog?

And what of this blog?

Should she axe the thing completely, or keep it going in some other vein? Keep writing about publishing/writing, or allow it to wander? Start afresh under a brave new pseudonym? Post pictures of church pews and kittens? Is it time for INTERN to slink off into the dusk?

Comment, and INTERN will ponder.

For now, she has that giant cookie to finish, and a train to catch, and a felicitous jig or two to dance when she gets home.

INTERN will post again soon with some debriefing-type thoughts on interning in general. Also: INTERN is still available for hire for all sorts of writerly critiquerly business, even (especially!) if she runs away to sea.

Off, now, an intern no more, to greet what disasters come next!

104 comments:

  1. Well, I for one hope to continue reading of The Intern's adventures in publishing, whether it is as a "pre-published" author (humor intended!!!! honest!!!!) or just your witty comments on whatever the hell you like.

    Because you amuse. :)

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  2. Goodbyes and endings are always sad. I don't understand the American system enough to know what might come next for you but I hope you enjoy whatever it is.

    I've really enjoyed your blog, so whatever you decide to do I hope you'll keep us posted.

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  3. I'm sure whatever you do: firelookout, vaccuum cleaner salesperson, feeder of pigeons from a park bench, whatever, you'll write about it with wit and humor.

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  4. No more Intern blogs? A truly sad day indeed.
    Next I shall discover that the world isn't populated by crazed Amish zombie/vampire unicorns who secretly manipulate the world's political system in order to harvest gingerbread for their sinister army of teddy bears.
    What? You say that I just made that up for dramatic effect? O.o What a miserable day this is turning out to be...

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  5. Dear Intern,
    I may indeed call upon your services at some future date.
    Your writing is delightful
    and you should certainly continue blogging
    as to subject matter
    let it arise spontaneously from wherever you other various thoughts spring from.
    Also try adding pictures
    if you like pictures that is

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  6. I hope that you do still write something as I have thoroughly enjoyed reading your blog - I love your writing style. I would be interested to see where you go next - if you decide to start up something new, be sure to link so we can follow you!

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  7. Dude, you need to keep writing. Job search blog!

    And you need to post any new address you have so I can keep you in my google reader feed. You're the most entertaining writer in there.

    - Haley from Kansas

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  8. I say you run off to sea but keep the blog and rename it INTERNational Pirate or some such clever play at words. We still need you, INTERN!

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  9. I shall miss "INTERN" should she vanish. It would be preferable to be permitted to accompany her, even if she does change her name, into the new life and direction she chooses.

    In other words, I find your perspective on life comforting, enlivening, and generally worth taking time for. If it is no longer there, then I will miss that special flower I love to stop and enjoy in the Google Reader Garden.

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  10. Will INTERN ever reveal her super secret identity and book?

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  11. What's a cowboy without his horse, spurs and lasso?

    And what business does he have blogging as a cowboy...if he ain't one anymore?

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  12. Oh poo.

    But I hope you find something you love.

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  13. Well, whatever you decide, know you will be missed if you run away to sea. ;)

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  14. If INTERN enjoys this blog, she should continue; if not, life is too short to waste on things that don't add happiness.

    As for me, I enjoy your wit and will follow wherever you go.

    Okay, I didn't mean it like that!

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  15. Good luck! I hope you keep this up in some way, shape, or form. Your thoughts are a bright spot in my day. :)

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  16. Please keep going. You're hilarious. You're voice is distinct, and I don't get bored reading you. It doesn't matter if you change topics, but I like reading about publishing.

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  17. Intern formerly known as INTERN -

    Please keep blogging and post pics of pews & kittens.

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  18. Please don't quit! I love reading your blog. It's so clever that I would continue reading even if publishing ceased being a topic you discussed. Even if you posted pictures of church pews and kittens.

    my memory isn't that good but didn't you mention a while back that you wrote a book? why don't you blog about trying to get an agent? or, if you already have an agent and it's getting published, why don't you post about becoming a published author?

    frankly, I think you are so funny that I'd read anything you wrote, I just think those two topics would be of interest to the people that already follow your blog.

    good luck (and keep blogging!!!)

    K. Catalona

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  19. Keep blogging! I came for publishing and writing, but I'll follow for your wit, to a new pseudonym ... wherever your thoughts wander.

    Please .. no church pews or kittens.

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  20. Well, I request that you continue blogging. At least in one capacity or another.

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  21. My husband and I both enjoy your view of the world, as well as your thoughts on writing and publishing. I hope you'll continue this blog even if you are no longer an intern.

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  22. INTERN has to keep blogging--in whatever manner she sees fit! Please please please

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  23. Keep the blog. It's a breath of fresh writerly air. Blog about your upcoming book and the marketing of said. We need to experience that from your unique perspective.

    cheers, Jan

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  24. Keep writing! About anything you want, really, as long as it isn't church pews or kittens. Those beg for pictures rather than words, as you have already suspected.

    And please let us know about your whereabouts and your new brave pseudonym.

    Good luck!

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  25. I hope you keep us posted - I'm so curious about what you'll do next - stay in publishing? Join the circus? Become a pirate? Keep us in the loop!

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  26. I have thoroughly enjoyed reading your posts and sharing them with my interns. If you do decide to leave this blog, please post a link to your next blog endeavor.

    Good luck with life after interning! :)

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  27. For some reason I just imagined readers shouting "Intern! Come back!" like at the end of "Shane." And this is why I need afternoon coffee. I don't even like westerns.

    As for what to do next? I think you should travel from publishing company to publishing company, fixing them, saving the industry. Build up your legend. "Wander the earth. Like Caine in Kung-Fu." Which is kind of another western.

    But in all seriousness: I vote for keeping this blog. What would we read for a laugh or wisdom as the afternoon drags on if you didn't update?

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  28. New pseudonym, but still about publishing/writing, with added kittens. Delish.

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  29. I love the blog, and would be sorry to see it go. I see how, now that you're no longer an intern, the name makes less sense, but I'm hoping you'll continue, and, if under another pseudonym, will at least let us know where to find the new incarnation.

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  30. We need for the INTERN to get a job as an editorial assistant or some other such low-paying job that will keep her edgy enough, but will contribute to her need for train fare! Don't abandon your blog and identity as INTERN because really, to us the faithful, that is what you'll always be. Think Elizabeth Taylor, who a hundred years and ten husbands later, is STILL Elizabeth Taylor--same concept.
    Find a cafe with free wifi and continue to regale and inform us that need to know what's what in the publishing industry. Who would do that for us? No one but you. So, Please. Don't run away to sea where the internets might not find you.

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  31. But INTERN I only just found you!

    Best of luck in all the decisions that lie ahead.

    :)

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  32. Intern, please, pretty please, tell us how we can find your book when it comes out. Even if it's about the history of high school textbooks, I know every bit will be delightful!

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  33. I sincerely hope you stick around where we can find you. I've greatly enjoyed your posts!

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  34. INTERN is no longer an intern?

    Oh no! Isn't she going to join some other Big Fancy Publishing Office and entertain/educate us with more publishing related posts?

    Woe is me.

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  35. I would like to read about the Intern's search for a permanent job within the publishing industry. Then Intern can change the blog to "The Associate" and continue on.

    Otherwise, we're seriously loving the insider tidbits, and so if you can continue on in that vein about things you saw during your time as Intern, we'll lap it up as long as you can drag it.....

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  36. You can't leave us Intern. I love your blog! Keep writing about publishing, writing and where your life takes you.

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  37. I certainly enjoy your blogging so please do continue with that in some form or another. And pics of cute kittens are always wanted.

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  38. Bye bye Intern! You were so much fun but you are growing up now and morphing into Brave New Author.

    Best of Luck!

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  39. Whilst I hesitate to asperse your former workplace, I feel compelled to point out that if a mere three-quarters of their employees can spell the word INTERN, well, that may go a long way toward explaining their lack of perspicacity in not offering you a permanent position (not that you would necessarily wish to continue working in such a place, anyway).

    Concerning your options at this juncture, I highly recommend running away to sea. Men do it in order to learn to become men again, and I feel certain that women may do it for the same reason--to become women again, that is, not men--that would not do at all.

    But whatever you decide, you surely must continue to keep and publish your highly informative and entertaining journal, and to toss your readership a cybernautical breadcrumb or two in order that they might follow you to whatever venue you may next inhabit (if inhabiting is what one does with venues, and assuming venue is the word I am looking for).

    In any event, many thanks, congratulations and best of luck.

    Colonel James J. Farrell, CSA, Retired

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  40. You know, I don't give a flying f**k what you do next, as long as you keep on blogging. It's you we love, kiddo, not your job. So, if the INTERN turns into the SKIVVY or the BRAIN SURGEON, just post your new pseudonym before you leave so we can all stalk you to the new blog.

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  41. You must keep THE INTERN, else how should we find you amdist the blizzard of blogs? I appreciate how you say things as much as the things you say and would happily read on about non-publishing things. If you continue blogging about the writing world, all the better.

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  42. A new adventure awaits. Trip the light fantastic and dazzle in delight. The intern days are done - it's time to be paid for the disasters you create!

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  43. Oh Intern, please don't leave us hanging. I'm not much of a blog reader, but I read yours faithfully for its mix of laugh out loud stories of your (weird, but) everyday life (I mean, I'm still chuckling about that time you ran into your boss when you and boyfriend were dressed in sequined flight suit and bear costume respectively!) and for your insight into all kinds of publishing related craziness. Thanks for the laughs and the witty observations about books and those who write and edit them. Don't leave us without at least letting us know what comes next . . .

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  44. Even if, ended, it were only to merely exist, this blog would continue to brighten up the internet.

    It would nevertheless be sad to see it relegated to such.

    Yet I wonder at my motivations in this observation - are they merely selfish? What has THE INTERN gained from the experience, or may from its continuation? And if the considerable talent and industriousness to which this blog owes its origins were then directed to another creation of more benefit to THE INTERN, how could anyone object?

    Nevertheless; should THE INTERN procure gainful employment as THE ASSISTANT (or even THE JANITOR) I've no doubt the blog's loyal readers would continue to be entertained by her ongoing hijinks.

    And would the move really change the identity of the narrator? Or is not everyone, at some level, still an intern at heart; underpaid, struggling to discover a balance between work and home, full of hopes and dreams which are repeatedly dashed by well coiffed professionals with bigger pay packets and holiday homes in the Bahamas?

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  45. Intern should not axe this blog because I would read it even if you only commented on church pews and kittens. Somehow I believe you could make that entertaining . . .

    If Intern doesn't find work in publishing, then perhaps Intern has a career in fashion. Your description of that outfit with the hammer belt was intriguing. Your blog has never failed to make me smile. Best of luck, Intern.

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  46. I suspect that I would enjoy pretty much anything Ex-Intern chooses to write about.

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  47. Keep the blog! If all is right with the world, I'm sure you'll continue on with some publishing-industry-related-endeavor and I want to hear all about it.

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  48. Oh, INTERN, dear INTERN. Slink not into that good night. Seriously... this blog is invaluable. But if the pseudonym no longer suits you, find one that does. And can you leave a forwarding address?

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  49. Wow! What a time, huh? I'm glad you're sticking around here, though. Right? Good luck!

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  50. Aw. I love your blog, and I don't want to see it end. I think you should allow it to evolve as you set out on whatever endeavor you choose next. Call it AFTER INTERN or something :)

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  51. Not to play shrink, cause I ain't no shrink, but you already know the answer to this. To whether to continue the blog as well as whether to go a-gallivanting off into the great unknown, both.

    Park on those church pews and wail on the melodica and say, yes, a-ha, alas and alack, I do enjoy _______ _______ _______ ____ _ ___ __________ a mite lot, goldurnit.

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  52. Congratulations and condolences! Kepp posting, as a struggling writer your experiences and insights have be so helpful. You rock!

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  53. I hope you decide to keep blogging. I've really enjoyed reading your fun-but-revealing posts about the publishing world, even though I'm barely a reader, and never a writer. So keep it up.

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  54. Don't go! Perhaps start a query critiquing/general advice thing here.

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  55. please keep writing this blog, even if you are no longer an intern at Big Fancy Publishing House. Yours is one of the few writerly/publishy/bookish blogs I check on a regular basis.

    I would be sad if it weren't updated. :(

    you don't want to make my face look like a colon paired with a parenthesis... do you?

    but if you wanted to add church pews and kittens, that'd be fun too.

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  56. Simple name change, just like you said: Intern No More. I'm sure you can make just as much fun of your next job on here, wherever your train takes you.

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  57. Your words of wisdom and wit would be sorely missed should you go.

    I do think former INTERN should consider continuing the blog in the writerly/publishing vein. Perhaps with the occasional dabbling into your thoughts on critiquing/editing, or details of your experiences with such?

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  58. Ive never commented before, but please keep posting! I love every entry, your writing is hilarious and insightful

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  59. Whether you start a new blog or keep up with this one in some new guise, I'll still read it. Good luck!

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  60. Remember to take a bottle of rum and a yo-ho-ho. I wish you bon voyage.

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  61. Stay!

    Maybe apply for another intern position?

    Either way, keep blogging.

    Love this blog:)

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  62. New blog: THE WRITER, FORMERLY KNOWN AS INTERN

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  63. Do not axe this site and all that has gone before. It is valuable, it is fun. You are too good to check-out from this. Build it. If under another pseudonym, keep this INTERN web site somehow attached. Do not destroy/discount the work you have already done, and readers gathered. That's not the way the web works. As you know. Look forward to whatever you have on your mind.

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  64. The offer to come to France and be a spy still stands. INTERN can be your cover.

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  65. Is the Intern up for adoption? *sniff, sniff*

    I wish I had something pithy to say...

    I hope you keep this blog open, in whatever form. I hope even more for good things for the Intern. She is a very nice and friendly and smart and funny gal who deserves it... *sniff, sniff*

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  66. Keep writing, please! Your posts are wonderfully hilarious, even the ones not directly related to interning.
    As for starting afresh, if you do decide to axe this site and make a new blog/website with cat pictures, please let us know where to find you?

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  67. Congrats! And NOOOOOOO you can't shut this blog down! Think of the children! Oh, er, I mean the readers of course.

    I have enjoyed your insights and anecdotes, and dearly hope you continue to provide them as you embed your unique footprints on your shiny new path.

    Best of luck!!

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  68. The horizon is yours! I do hope you'll keep the blog up so we of lesser freedoms can follow your adventures on land or at sea.

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  69. A sad yet happy day for you, I am sure. I've enjoyed your posts and shall miss them, but I do hope you find a way to continue posting, even if you can no longer call yourself INTERN. Good luck in whatever you do next. I'm sure you will do well and go far.

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  70. RACHEL thinks INTERN should keep rocking the free world, everything else is bonus :D

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  71. Good luck, INTERN. I hope you keep writing your blog in whatever incarnation you choose. Some of your posts are classics (I loved the writing retreat posts).

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  72. Well, INTERN, I only found you about a month ago and I think you're hilarious - so i would be sad to have the blog discontinue - even if you aren't an official intern. Maybe you're life's INTERN?
    But whatever you decide to do, I wish you the absolute best!

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  73. Keep writing the blog, please-- you made it into that .001% of blogs followed by people who aren't in the immediate family!

    You could always post pictures of kittens posing in front of different types of bike racks. There might be a field guide/coffee table book in that. Or you could write a coffee table book about people's asinine suggestions for coffee table books.

    And congratulations on finishing the internship!

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  74. This has been an enjoyable, and very informative blog. Thank you. No advice to offer on your future. You'll figure it out.

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  75. Dear INTERN,
    Please keep writing, blog or otherwise. Even if you are no longer an INTERN, I am sure I am not the only one who enjoys reading your words.

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  76. You may be unsure as to plot, but you have a character and voice in spades. I hope that you continue in publishing--you're too good to lose--and that you continue this blog. I, for one, hope to hear more about the well-oiled editorial meetings. "Intern", in the archaic sense, could continue... as Intern-Ass, Intern-Ed, and finally (oh glorious day) Intern-Pub.

    Regarding kitten/church pew pics: these would be the bloggish equivalent to sending head shots and glitter with your manuscript. I'd suggest restraint. But if it will keep you in the game, by all means, bring them on!

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  77. My selfishness demands that you continue your publishing blog. However, dear intern, you must go where your heart leads. (I hope it leads to more awesome posts!)

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  78. Reader has no advice for Intern vis-à-vis next steps, being in similar dilemma.

    However, Reader wishes Intern well in any/all future endeavors and begs Intern to continue blogging, be it about goat processing, kitten photography or (Reader’s personal favorite) books.

    Reader needs to laugh and hopes Intern will post new blog persona before shutting down this one. Reader will follow.

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  79. Congrats! On to bigger things! You should become an Oatmeal Cookie critic. Replace your name with a symbol like ;O and be called "The Formerly called Intern", and seek oatmeal cookie wonders. You could blog about that.

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  80. Intern - I think you should keep it going and post whatever you see fit for as long as you feel to, allowing the blog to evolve as it will.

    Just my too sense.

    dylan

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  81. Selfishly, I ask that you continue writing your writerly thoughts, even if from sea. I have learned much from your rambles through the publishing wilderness, and to not have you around would leave a small but important hole in my day, although possibly my work productivity would improve by 5 or 10 minutes.

    Unselfishly, do whatever it is that your heart requires, and good luck.

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  82. THE INTERN,

    The Marianne Strong Literary Agency is looking for an intern. I am in no way affiliated with them, but I was just on Craigslist and saw the freshly posted ad. Perhaps you could explore (and blog about) various aspects of the publishing industry?

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  83. Dear Intern,

    I have been lurking on your blog since it first began. Please don't leave me. Write about anything, I like you with my coffee while I pretend to work.

    Please and thank you.

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  84. My opinion, in all its importance, is thus:

    Stay THE INTERN, for will you not always be THE INTERN at heart? Also, yes to kitties.

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  85. You MUST keep some kind of blog going. You crack me up! It doesn't have to be about writing. I like your zany life-stories.

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  86. May I suggest the blog trajectory of Miss Snark as worthy of emanation? That way, you would be back and we could find you again. Looking forward to that, farewell and thanks, Intern!

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  87. Keep writing! For us. For yourself. Your blog makes me smile each time I read it. And as a publishing intern, also coming to the end of my internship (as a second career) without a publshing job, or my old job, to go to, I need those smiles. I don't even mind you keeping the INTERN moniker... The Net needs more like you. Take care and don't take off.

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  88. What? No one's commented yet?

    Well, I don't know what everyone else wants, but I LOVE reading this blog. I hope it continues in any form--it's hilarious! Preferably, I'd like more writing/publishing stuff, but whatever is fine with me!

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  89. thanks all for lovely, heartwarming comments. INTERN is going to try to keep posting for a while longer about this and that, and bail if it's a disaster. new post anon!

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  90. I agree: Yes to kitties, and YES to INTERN! Well, okay, you can replace INTERN with other publishing-related-or-regular-Joe-job-title, but please keep sharing your awesome publishing industry knowledge and unique wit :). We'll miss you too much, otherwise.

    Our lives will have an INTERN-shaped hole, dude!

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  91. If the world needs anything, it's more pictures of church pews and kittens. So stay you must.

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  92. INTERN, I hope you don't leave! At the very least I wish you would reveal your identity so we can all go out and buy your book ; ) Good luck with your next adventure! I hope you take us along for the ride.

    Wishing you all the best! And thank you again for your first chapter jousting comments. They were very helpful!

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  93. YAYYYYYYYY glad to hear you're going to keep posting. I love your writing.

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  94. Time to outturn, cool! Or outrun. But don't tune out... oh no.

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  95. Intern--I hope you continue the blog but if the world beckons to better and bigger things, answer it! I wish you well.

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  96. Looking forward to the "The CEO formerly known as INTERN" Blog.

    Keep it here or start afresh, it matters not. Just be sure to let us know where you are.

    Where you go, we shall follow.
    All the very best -
    G.

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  97. You never got around to telling us who'd you rather be: the Beatles or the Rolling Stones?

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  98. Definitely keep it rolling. As a fixture in the post-grad intern limbo myself, I look to your blog for advice and snappy repartee. Don't leave the blogosphere -- we NEEDJA.

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