Monday, May 10, 2010

the lewd world of Big 6 anagrams...

INTERN was reading Publishers Weekly this morning and feeling mystical, and she started making anagrams of Big 6 publishers' names (full disclosure: the Internet Anagram Server stepped in to help). Her findings surprised even INTERN.

The Anagrams

Simon & Schuster came off rather fastidious—maybe a little too fastidious, as the third anagram indicates:

Cushiest Norms
Mensch Suitors
Scrotums Shine

Random House was a little more earthy, even barnyard-y.

Around Homes
Moaned Hours
Unheard Moos
Humane Odors

HarperCollins was simply rude:

Phallic Snorer

Penguin Group was muttering in a paranoid manner:

Pup, Ignore Gun!

Macmillan had only one thing to say about the best place to sell books:

Manic Mall

Hachette Book Group revealed its coping strategy for the recession:

Toke A Potherb, Cough

Happy Monday everyone!


  1. I used to make these all the time. My family still won't play word games with me. :)

  2. That explains a lot. I’m definitely going to look more into Hachette than Simon & Schuster.

    “The INTERN” doesn’t make many words, of course, but The Rejectionist comes out as "I Reject Shit Note."

    Anyone wants to try their own, here’s a how-to guide for that site:

    If you put in your full name, it’ll give you something like 45,455 variations – far more than you want to read through.

    So the first thing to do is put a 5 in the box that says “Minimum number of letters in each word.” This will narrow things down to about 5,000.

    That’s still too many to read, so start to winnow out the words you don’t like. For instance, when I did my niece’s name, I didn’t think she’d enjoy seeing any phrase with the words bowel, macabre, or ogler. Also take out any words you don’t recognize.

    The way to do this is jot about twenty of them down and then hit the back button and type them in under “Anagrams must exclude these words."

    Now comes the fun part – look for words you do want to be in the anagram. For my niece, who has a horse, it was “cowgirl.” That word you put in the “Anagrams must include this word” slot.

    That took the list down to just 41 phrases, including Cowgirl Blaze Camel Three.

    But all the words are still long. So you turn off the 5 letter word filter. Now you get about 3,000 anagrams.

    That’s still a lot, so I took out a bunch more words: mewl lee em ell whet thew heme erg mew rec rem re mag cram clew lac.

    I also added the name of her horse, Raz. That brought it all down to just 341 phrases, including:

    Each Belle Met Raz Cowgirl
    Raz, “Teach Me, Cowgirl Belle”
    Raz Call, “Be Thee Me Cowgirl”

    For my other niece the site gave this: I Mare Woman Smell Cod

    Remember you can always change the order of the words they give you for them to make more sense. And adding your middle name will give you many more options.

  3. Thank you! I needed the laugh today.

  4. Unheard Moos! I love it.

  5. I now definitely want to be published by Simon & Schuster or Harper Collins :)

  6. You might enjoy this piece on how not to apply to be an intern:

  7. The scrotum one for Simon & Schuster is eerily appropriate! S&S published the recent Newbery Medal winner, THE HIGHER POWER OF LUCKY. This book ended up on the front page of the New York Times because it had the word "scrotum" on the first page and some folks were questioning its appropriateness for kids.