This morning INTERN is bleary of eye and shaky of hand, and intensely relieved to be back at her little nook at the office after a lengthy 4th of July weekend-turned-surrealist movie.
It went like this:
Saturday, 7:03 PM: Roommate: "Hey, I met some cool people who live on a circus bus and I invited them over for a potluck."
8:12 PM: Bus-dwelling circus people arrive, wearing (most fittingly) an assortment of tutus, fur coats, colorful capes, and giant shoes. They bring lots of extra friends but no food, so INTERN's boyfriend starts making a vat of chili to feed the hordes.
9:00 PM: Off-the-wall hilarity when a young gentleman on LSD starts making amorous advances on the unsuspecting living room carpet. His girlfriend, also on LSD, pouts in a corner, her fairy wings folded up behind her back. Kids, this is why INTERN stays away from drugs.
10:10 PM: INTERN ducks into her bedroom to get something to find that four slightly out-of-place hipsters have pushed her bed against the wall and are setting up a drum kit, amps, and mics. "Uh, the guy with the clown wig said we could play a show in here."
11:00 PM: There is, indeed, some kind of indie-techno show going down in INTERN's bedroom. It is awesome. People are dancing sweatily and the band is clearly having the time of its life.
12:00 AM: Fireworks. (obviously)
12:40 AM: People start coming back into the house after the fireworks. The chili is finally ready, and the masses chow down.
1:30 AM: It becomes obvious that nobody has any intention of leaving...until MONDAY. Roomate: "Oh yeah, I thought a big sleepover would be fun."
This is where INTERN started to get nervous. There is nothing INTERN loves more than a good party, and technically a 60-hippie sleepover sounds like a barrel of fun, but there is a little snag when it comes to sleeping which is: INTERN must sleep or her already-tenuous grasp on reality will dissolve.
2:30 AM: It becomes obvious that nobody has any intention of sleeping...until MONDAY. The atmosphere is noisy and frenetic. INTERN takes a sleeping pill and barricades herself in her room.
4:30 AM: Banging of pots and pans in the kitchen. INTERN, heavily sedated, stumbles out of her room to see what is up. Two circus girls are boiling their menstrual cups on the stove. They explain the mechanics and environmental advantages of said to a dazed INTERN. INTERN goes back to bed.
5:30 AM: Someone is ringing a Tibetan gong to mark the sunrise. People are chanting.
At risk of making this an overly long, completely non-publishing related post, INTERN will sum up the rest of party by saying the second half of it was basically like watching the first half again in rewind. By Monday morning, INTERN was a cheerful and gracious yet mildly psychotic bundle of life. The circus bus left. INTERN, boyfriend, and roommate collapsed on various pieces of furniture.
Tuesday and Wednesday were bonafide mental health days: sleep, herbal tea, and lots of whole grains.
Today is Thursday! INTERN is back at her aforementioned nook, with a stack of manuscripts as high as a table waiting to be sorted through and read. Life is veryveryvery good!
wow. just...wow. are there photos?
ReplyDeleteYour life is a reality show story in progress. Too funny, too surreal. Eh, exactly what is a menstrual cup?
ReplyDeleteWhat a crazy story! I wish I'd been there - well, not for all of it, I suppose... :)
ReplyDeleteGreetings,
poet
With a weekend like that, who needs fiction?
ReplyDeleteROFL. Today's manuscripts have a high bar to hurtle to catch your attention.
I was there the first time round...............it was fun
ReplyDeletesort of
you write beautifully...
Speechless. Here I thought I was leading an interesing life! Hands down this is the craziest holiday weekend I've ever heard of.
ReplyDeleteI can't believe that happened to you! Fantastic post and welcome back : )
ReplyDeleteHoly schnikes. I'm sort of surprised Gretchen Fetchin the Slime Queen wasn't there, too.
ReplyDeleteAnd I really want to google menstrual cup but...I'm afraid.
I must know... what is a menstrual cup? please elaborate....
ReplyDeleteJesus, people. What do you THINK a menstrual cup is? Don't make her google it for you.
ReplyDeleteThis makes me never want to move to New York. You make LA look tame. Glad you survived to write about it! :)
ReplyDeleteI'm off to google menstrual cups. Are they anything like my neighbor's home made reusable pads that she uses and wants to make for me as a gift? Bleh.
ReplyDeleteI second the question.
ReplyDeleteyes, please do.
ReplyDeleteHaste yee back ;-) was in college in the 60's. You had a Fellini party. Ours started every thursday night... went on 'till class started on Monday. Stoned midgets, (couldn't touch the Harley motocycle pedals), were most fun... at least, I think they were midgets, or maybe the Hogs just run themselves!!!
ReplyDeleteAnyway, Snow White would bring 'em!
Haste yee back ;-)
Menstrual cups... well, have you ever watched 'em change the oil in you car. They roll this big oil cup catcher think under the crank-case, unscrew the bolt, stand back and watch her flow... sort of like that!
ReplyDeleteHaste yee back ;-)
thanks Haste Yee, that was really helpful...
ReplyDeleteINTERN say: Haste yee has it right. I could not think of a better metaphor myself!
ReplyDeletemenstrual cup people, google "Diva" cup... all the Peace Corps hippie chicks, and then some, have them.
ReplyDelete